Bit short of cash tried to sell the B50

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bonnietiler
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Bit short of cash tried to sell the B50

Postby bonnietiler » Sat May 26, 2018 12:58 pm

Being a touch short of the old readies..I decided that the best course of action was to sell the B50 (It didn't sell..I'm glad) I listed it on a well known Online Auction website and got a flurry of offers and questions etc etc. I bought the bike for £4500 and have bought a new Lozenge Silencer, Tri-Spark Ignition and coil. brand NOS Headlight assembly, brand new top of the range Amal carb around £700 that lot...I can start it, thanks to all your help over the past 12months almost every time...But..It is like English Mustard an acquired taste, a black art that needs work and care..My bike will start as long as absolutely everything is in the correct order..Piston at TDC..carb tickled ease it over using the valve lifter let the kickstart return to the top and kick as if there is a gentleman in Sydney Australia who you just don't like...strangely, on mine you need a little throttle as well.. So, I get a call..Lets call him George..." Hello, can I come and see your bike?"..."Why of course, you'd be more than welcome".."I shall be with you between 4.30pm and 7.00pm" Thanks I shall wait in..He arrived at 6.55pm..He was short of stature dressed in shorts and a pair of stylish trainers..."Oh..you have a Triumph Stag..are you selling that?" Er..no...." Oh you have a Triumph Trident T150..are you selling that?"
Erm..this is the B50..
Oh yes..he picked and prodded at my really nice bike like somebody trying to identify the different type of spots on a Leper, he was a touch sneery..
My son was sat on the garden chair smoking a roll-up..he was smirking as he could see I was a little unsettled by this strange potential buyer..
Can you start it? quoth old sour-puss
Of course..I went through the long procedure..I could see he getting bored..TDC..valve lifter..reset kickstart, think of that evil Australian who had besmirched my daughter...paint genitalia with Engineers Blue,don Helmet equipped with Antler Horns, repeat Lords Prayer backwards and DOWN I thrust..and it was a THRUST..no mistaking it..It fired up first time... "Can I have a go!" chirps Frodo...I begin my explanation of how its all done and he just goes to the bike whilst its on its sidestand and kicks...Well..you know a B50...if there is anything that they cant abide..its over-confidence..crack it went..Frodo wimpered..almost mewed as the kick start slipped from his flat soled trainer and with a dull thud..not unlike a large leather medicine ball being dropped on an unsuspecting flabby abdomen..it slapped his calf..
There's something wrong with it he bleated
My Son by this time is convulsed trying to hold the laughter within he has assumed the same hue as my Engineers Blue!
I'll do it again, I repeated the rigmarole and it fired again..My Son almost burst into a round of celebratory applause.
Frodo was not completely deflated he went again as he limped over dragging his dead leg behind him..he made a frankly pathetic attempt, I suppose if the bike had been a100cc S*zuki two-stroke it might ...might have worked...it did fire ..abit..somewhere at the bottom of the darkest pit in hades on the wrong stroke and lifted Samwise up and he fell to the floor..as if shot by a Japanese sniper..My Son..could not keep the cork in the champagne bottle and spat his tea over the garden table...
Crestfallen..Bilbow left without even the merest glance over his shoulder...mentally noting I suspect that perhaps an electric start machine might be best

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minetymenace
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Re: Bit short of cash tried to sell the B50

Postby minetymenace » Sat May 26, 2018 6:55 pm

LMFAO <983 <965 :laugh

Nice write up.
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skippy
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Re: Bit short of cash tried to sell the B50

Postby skippy » Sat May 26, 2018 11:43 pm

So funny It's times like this you need a video. :laugh :laugh
Doug
Should never have sold them old motorbikes

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JB
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Re: Bit short of cash tried to sell the B50

Postby JB » Wed May 30, 2018 8:37 am

That's a brilliant written comedy story you have told there, would have loved to have seen that, so funny it makes me laugh every time I read it :laugh :laugh :laugh

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Re: Bit short of cash tried to sell the B50

Postby midgie » Wed May 30, 2018 5:27 pm

I agree, its so true and made me chuckle.

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Re: Bit short of cash tried to sell the B50

Postby nopdog » Mon Jun 04, 2018 2:00 am

Yep!!! That's pretty darn funny!!!!

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Re: Bit short of cash tried to sell the B50

Postby ghislain » Wed Jun 06, 2018 10:45 am

A friend decided to sell a BSA A7 few years ago... Potential buyer arrived ,and asked "May I try it ? Sure you can ...the guy jumped on the seat and began to push firmly on the horn button ... Starter doesn't work , he said ...and went away ... >44
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Re: Bit short of cash tried to sell the B50

Postby Canberra » Wed Jun 06, 2018 12:28 pm

I'm using 1979 T140 handlebar switches on my B50SS and for some reason they never had a headlamp flasher button. I thought of using the year later RH switch with the "start" button on it as the flasher. This was so amusing I'll think I'll do it :lol: .

John

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Re: Bit short of cash tried to sell the B50

Postby ringding » Thu Jun 07, 2018 12:43 pm

:laugh

Thanks! That has brightened up an otherwise dull day for me! :thumb
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